Middle names--why all the fuss?

It's an exciting time right now. In just a few short weeks we will know the sex of the babies. We strongly believe it will either be two girls, two boys, or one of each. And I truly do not have a preference though I think it would be neat to have one of each. By the way, after Shelly first told me she was pregnant I asked her what she wanted. She replied "a girl" and when she asked me I replied "twin boys". And I made several twin references in the week before finding out she actually was pregnant with twins. I'm available to pick your lottery numbers for a small fee.

At some point in the next few weeks after we know the sexes Shelly and I will assume our position at our kitchen table (unless our house sells then we would be at one of your kitchen tables). We'll take out the ole dry erase board and begin to craft two perfect names. We will go through multiple iterations of mental gymnastics for days before all others are crossed out and two remain.

Now let me caveat by saying I believe all people should have a middle name. I don't want my children to be that kid in class who cannot explain why mommy and daddy didn't provide them a middle name like all the other kids. But the energy we spend deciding on one just isn't fair to the amount of attention it receives later in life.

Think for a moment about your friends or co-workers. How many of their middle names do you know? That's right, not as many as you would think. And it doesn't count for people who go by both names like Cari Beth or John Henry. I'm going to give myself a little test right now. Between my sisters Marcy and Mandy, I have four nieces ranging from 5 months to 9 years old. I'm going to attempt to recall each of their middle names.

1. Addison Paige
2. Lilli Katherine
3. Sophie Marie
4. Vivian Mae

I'm fairly confident about #1 and #4. I'm less confident about #2 and #3. Sure, I could rattle off all of their full names at one time, but after the first year or so the names just weren't said that much, at least not around me.

Now I fully agree with David and Larry and Kim Parr. By the way, Larry's full name is actually Michael Lawrence Parr but he goes by Larry. Getting my point here? Okay, you gotta make sure it flows well and doesn't accidentally spell something bad like a boy named Andrew Samuel Stevenson. And I agree there will be opportunites to use their full names. Can't you just see Shelly's mom say, "Shelly LeAnn Deutscher, get in there and pick up all those shoes! You're 6 years old and you do not need 53 pairs of shoes!" Now I know that by using her full name like that it didn't work as her shoe count is twice that much now.

I would bet my middle name was used more in the first year than it has in the 35 years since then. Sure, I had to use it when I got by social security card in 1984 and when I joined the Army in 1988, but not much other than that. Go ahead and write out your full name. Feels a little awkward writing that middle name huh? I can't write in cursive. I'm sure I could at one time in Mrs. Smith's third grade class but I write in print now and the only thing I write in cursive is my name. So writing the beginning letter of my middle name makes my fingers hurt since I'm not used to it.

Well, I hope this dicussion results in you asking those friends and co-workers for their middle names. Who knows, might just improve your relationship with them to know that. And let us know how it goes.

Next topic will be "My lullaby phobia and why do they creep me out so much".

Big presentation to give in 2 hours. Wish me luck. Enjoy your Monday.

Michael Lee Essary
Seoul, South Korea